How Do I Feel Better About Being Single?

It’s always a thing, but it’s more of a thing at the holidays. If you find yourself struggling in singlehood, you are not alone, and you’re not without resources. I’m Shani Silver, a writer and podcaster focused on changing the negative narratives around being single, and improving the societal opinion of and impact on single women specifically.

I get questions on how to feel better about being single all year, but they increase at the holidays. That’s why I’ve compiled a little reading/listening list for you, that you can refer to any time you need support, community, and just a reminder that being single isn’t a bad thing—with information on how you can reframe your thoughts around singlehood to see it that way. I wish you all a happy and healthy holiday season. xo

The Single Girl Syllabus: Everyone should start here. A lot of my thoughtwork on singlehood is going to be different from what you’ve heard or read elsewhere, and this really lays the groundwork for it. It’s also where you can find my personal favorite pieces of work on singlehood. Whether you’re new to this space or just need a refresher, this is the starting point.

How To Feel Better About Being Single (Especially At The Holidays): Some new reframing examples for you, specifically geared toward the holiday season!

There Is Only One Reason Why You’re Still Single: You don’t need to listen to anyone’s “reasons” about you. You don’t even need to listen to the “reasons” you tell yourself. There is only one reason why anyone is single when they don’t want to be, and a little hint: it’s not about you. I hope this piece is helpful and comforting. I personally look at this “reason” with a lot of optimism and calm.

51 First Dates: I join the ladies of this fun podcast to talk about reframing the way we think and feel about being single.

It’s Okay To Want A Partner Right Now: Remember, you’re not doing anything wrong. It’s okay to want a partner and not have one. A dose of self-forgiveness for 2020.

The Alonement Podcast: Host Francesca Specter calls this episode of her podcast “compulsory listening for all single people,” and I can’t argue. ;)

100 Ways To Meet Your Husband: For anyone completely, entirely, 100% exhausted with dating apps.

How To Make New Friends As A Single Person: A great read to kick off a new year!