Shani Silver TWA.JPG

Hi, I’m Shani

I’m the host of A Single Serving Podcast and the author of A Single Revolution. I’m changing the narrative around being single, because so far it’s had pretty bad PR. I’m not an advocate for singlehood. I’m an advocate for women feeling good while single—there’s a difference.

What they say about my work

shanisilver@gmail.com

How To Be A Strong Freelance Negotiator

Originally published in November 2019

I used to be a lawyer, but there’s nothing I’m about to say regarding earning more money as a freelancer that has anything to do with that misguided endeavor. A little over a year ago, I became a full-time freelance writer.

Previously, I’d been an Editorial & Copy Director for a variety of startups in New York. I currently write copy for websites, marketing campaigns, and social media in a freelance capacity for a variety of brands, services, and agencies. In a more editorial space, I have a column every other week on a digital publication. I also write here, all the time.

Before I plunge myself into the sticky ball pit of negotiations, I will also give you the three pieces of advice I give to everyone who ever asks me about becoming or growing a business as a freelance writer, I think they’re a good starting point before working on negotiation strategies. If you’d like further freelance writing advice beyond this, I charge for one-hour Google Hangout sessions. Keep reading, and you’ll see why.

  • Your LinkedIn should be polished (and link to your website)

  • Your website/portfolio should be polished

  • You should be easy to contact

Even back when I was a full-time startup miserymonger, I always had freelance side projects. I wrote for xoJane and HuffPo and a number of websites that would let me complain about online dating. I have a lot of practice in the freelance rate space and I’m writing this because it’s only within the last year that I’ve learned how to stop viewing freelance negotiating as scraps being tossed to me. I now view it as an even exchange of money for services. I’ve also learned how to start saying no, and I thought others might like to start doing the same.

There are two main components of good freelance negotiating, in my experience. They are as follows:

Having Self Worth

Letting Go Of Fear

Freelance negotiating, probably most negotiating, isn’t about money. Making it about money brings up feelings of fear and guilt and uncertainty that it doesn’t need to deal with. Negotiating is actually about self worth. I know, I didn’t expect that to have much to do with it either. But earlier this year I began working on my self worth and ever since, my rates have gone up, and I’ve acquired new work at these rates. Not because of some random stroke of luck, but because I started living my life in my worth, rather than approaching freelance negotiations like I was begging for money, like I was lucky to get anything at all. I deserve much more than “anything at all,” and I know it.

I was settling for low rates because I didn’t think I was worth more. It’s uncomfortable to admit that and I genuinely didn’t realize that was happening. My writing talent and work ethic are the areas where I’ve always had the most confidence in myself, so that wasn’t it. It was my worth. I was assigning monetary value to myself, and I didn’t value myself much — at least not enough to ask to be compensated appropriately.

I didn’t have confidence to ask for what I was worth. I do now. (And I genuinely do recommend Lacy Phillips’ work for anyone struggling with low self worth.) My hourly rates are currently $25 higher than they were at the start of the year, and my freelance essay rate has doubled. I know for certain that I deliver work that meets or exceeds my clients expectations. But I knew that before, when I was earning less. It’s just that I ask for what I’m worth now.

But, self worth is only half of a negotiation strategy. You also have to shed fear.

In the freelance space, certainly in the female freelance space, we’re trained to treat every opportunity as the last one that will ever come along We’re taught to be grateful for everything we have, even if what we have is a freelance rate that’s a fraction of what it should be. Entertaining the notion that we’re not being paid enough is seen as ungrateful, not to mention we always have to be grateful for even having the work in the first place, right? We’re trained to be small, and full of fear.

I used to treat every opportunity like it was the last one I’d ever see. Then I raised my self worth, and for once had the bravery to say no. I started small, saying no to a project with a comically low rate. And then no to a rate just $100 or so less than what I wanted it to be. Now I never ask potential clients what their budget is, I convey my rates to them. If they say no, we don’t work together. That’s it.

The confidence to say no comes from having self worth, but it also comes from seeing that saying “no” doesn’t end your career or get you evicted from your apartment. It doesn’t end all opportunities coming your way. More always come, and every new opportunity is a chance to demonstrate your growing self worth and your diminishing fear to yourself, not to the person you’re negotiating with. Though it’s nice if they notice, too.

Negotiating should only happen when you’re 100% comfortable and confident saying no. It should happen when you’re not afraid of walking away because you know more opportunities will come, and you’re digging into your self worth to find out if something’s keeping it small. When I broke my own cycle of staying small and staying afraid, my work volume increased, and so did my income.

I want to make very clear that I’m not rude about it. There should always be a heaping portion of kindness and respect involved in your negotiations. Burning a bridge after a low rate is offered to you isn’t smart or even necessary. It is possible to stand firm in your worth, communicate your rates, and either accept or reject an offer all from a place of positivity, productivity, and respect. All of which can lead to future opportunities and in general just good word of mouth out there in the world about you. (Word of mouth is actually how I acquired all of my current copywriting clients.)

I think it’s about self worth, and removing fear. That’s what’s worked for me so far, and what I trust will continue to work for me in the future. I am earning a living as a freelance writer, now it’s my job to continue to do good work, and to have successful negotiations, to build a career even beyond even what I dream for myself. Because the money is nice, but work you love, and the freedom to pursue it, are everything.

Shopping For Going Out Clothes At Age 37

The Rules For The Facebook Group About Facebook Group Rules

0